Well, it’s New Year’s Eve, my plans for the night were just cancelled (it was a very small gathering with people in our bubble, it was cancelled due to snow, don’t go there with me), and so I’m starting this reflective piece sober at 5:14 pm instead of tipsy at 1:00 am (which was the original plan).
This year was challenging. Beast got laid off right before the move, and my own income streams that dried up in 2020 have not come back. The move was particularly taxing. We left the home and city we loved to be closer to family, and I’m not sure any of us realized just how much we would miss Seattle. I miss that cold, rainy, pretentious, overpriced city so much that I still cry about it sometimes. The house that we’re living in is still half finished, and renovations that were supposed to be done in November might, hopefully, be done by February. Half my life is still in boxes. I’m behind on everything.
I’m not trying to say it’s all been bad, or even that things are bad now. They’re not. Obviously things are going well enough if we still have a home and everyone is healthy and somehow no one in the house has caught COVID despite not always being on point with our precautions. That said, there’s still a layer of frustration and depression in the household. We made all these changes and moved our lives and shifted everything for the promise of something better. So far, though, it’s not better. Add to that the continued pandemic, our country’s absurd political situation, and the continued uncertainty that has permeated our lives since early 2020, and no one is at their best. Motivation is hard to come by, but I’m reaching for it as best as I can, because I have things to do.
Which brings us to goals. So, I don’t do resolutions anymore. Haven’t for a while. They’re stupid, no one keeps them, and people just get depressed when they inevitably don’t do that thing that they kind of deep down already knew they wouldn’t do to begin with. “New Year, new you” is bullshit. It’s the same you when our made up concept of time and the year shift. I’m not going to magically hit the gym three days a week because it’s January 1st.
I do, however, have goals. So, what’s the difference between goals and resolutions? Goals are something to achieve. Resolutions are absolute – you do it, or you fail. Goals are something you’re working on, something you’re aspiring to, and if you don’t meet your goal it’s okay. You just keep trying.
Goals for 2022:
1. Write a little every day. Now, when I say this, I mean for my WIPs, not blogs or social media posts. There’s no minimum word count here, I just have to write something every day.
2. Regular social media updates. Pretty self explanatory, really. I’ve ignored IG for months, and have been puttering a little on Twitter (finally more than 100 followers! Wee!) but there’s a lot more to do.
3. More dates. This year has been kind of garbage for romantic time with my Beast. We need more time together, and not just grabbing a quick dinner on the way home from running errands.
4. Finish two books. This is actually an achievable goal because I have work that’s half and three quarters done that I just need to put some steady time into. See goal 1.
5. Start reading again, and more specifically indie authors. I used to consume books rabidly. Having kids and my eyesight deteriorating slowed that quite a bit. I would really like to start reading again. I miss it.
And that’s it! Five aspirational goals for the new year. No weird promises to myself that I can’t keep, just things to do my best to achieve. The way the past couple years have gone, we really need to be more gentle with ourselves. No more impossible hurdles. Just something better to strive for.